(Pixieland Diaries #2)
Publication date: July 28th 2020
Genres: Paranormal, Romance, Young Adult
Big news in Pixieland! The Blue Fairy is sending our fave pixie, Calla, and her crush, Dare, on a mini-quest.
Unfortunately it’s an adventure that requires a lot of togetherness. We’re talking tons of touching, people.
Blue believes that since Calla and Dare are just friends, this situation shouldn’t be awkward.
It’s totally awkward.
***A 30,000+ word diary written by Calla***
“I absolutely love Christina Bauer’s style, full of action, intense scenes, and characters that will test one’s imaginations to the max!” – Tome Tender Book Blog
1. Pixieland Diaries
Ba ba ba ba ba ba BAAAAA!
I now have a master plan for entrapping my elf subjects. Not to toot my own horn about this scheme, but toot toot. The brilliance of my scheme is that it’s based on one of the greatest secrets in all elfdom. In fact, if this truth were known, it could upend the very balance of power between Earth and Faerie.
I’ll share it here anyway because in my heart I shall always be a nasty-ass pixie.
My Mind-Blowing Secret Of The Elves
Behold: If you want to lure elves somewhere, just leave out a bowl of Cheetos. That stuff is elf crack. The end.
Amazing, am I right?
Last time I used bait, I chose fairy dust. Big miss. Someone cast a spell protecting my people from being magically summoned. Since fairy dust is magic—or in the case of what I left out, it’s also boobytrapped with even more magic—that set off the protection spell. No one showed up.
This time, I’m using an elf lure that is magic free. One might think the lowly Cheeto is not up to this mighty task. One would be sorely mistaken.
Mysteries of the Cheeto
One. You cannot enchant other foods into Cheetos. Magically-made snacks simply don’t carry that special chemical tang that says humans made this.
Two. If you’re a Cheetelf—and yes, that’s totally a thing—then your treats only come from Earth. Which isn’t an easy trip for most fae. For my part, I’ve been visiting the human world for ages. It’s one benefit of having the Ley Queen as my secret mom. Long story.
Three. These days, my Cheeto collection is so large, I could trade it for a huge chunk of land in Upper Faerie.
Four. Yet I’m sacrificing part of my snacks in order to lure my new subjects, the summer elves, into a face-to-face chat.
To set my trap, I choose the Sunflower Chamber of my new palace. It’s a round space with a circular table in the center. As you may have guessed, everything here is painted in a retina-searing shade of yellow. After setting out a massive bowl in the table’s center, I pour in five party-size bags of Cheetos.
Phase one of my plan is complete.
Waving my hand, I release enough fairy dust to create an enchanted puff of air. The breeze carries some chemical cheese odor out into the hallway and beyond.
Phase two, coming up.
Tiptoeing across the room, I scoot behind the door and wait. To kill time, I straighten the ermine cloak hanging over my shoulders. Underneath I still wear my favorite pink dress because COMFORT and POCKETS. In my right hand, I grip my scepter.
Suddenly, a stampede of silk-clad feet sounds down the outer hallway. Heh heh. The first prey arrives.
Bauer has also told the story of the Women’s March on Washington by leading PR efforts for the Massachusetts Chapter. Her pre-event press release—the only one sent out on a major wire service—resulted in more than 19,000 global impressions and redistribution by over 350 different media entities including the Associated Press.
Christina graduated from Syracuse University’s Newhouse School with BA’s in English along with Television, Radio, and Film Production. She lives in Newton, MA with her husband, son, and semi-insane golden retriever, Ruby.
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